the number 4

So, I'm proud that this time around I was somewhat lucky in hiding my sickness and puking longer. We didn't have to explain early on luckily. But now, well, I'm pretty darn pudgy. So, rather than giving a false impression that I've just given up and let myself go. I better explain.

There is something growing inside me.

I like this angle, because, as Whitney said, "It looks like a duck."

Yes, it does. I tried to explain that it was it's arm making it look like that, but, nonetheless, it does look half duck/half alien right now.

I'm just over 13 weeks. 7 week countdown of sickness left. I'm thrilled of the prospect of having four kids. But more the idea of what it will be like in 2 years from now. When this duck is walking and talking like Hailey. I remember all too well what pregnancy and the stress of sleep-deprevation and lack of freedom of a newborn brings to be extrememly excited for that. But the end game, yes, I'm thrilled about. If I'm non-existent for a couple years though, now you know why. I may be in a mental institution somewhere.

But in all honesty. When I saw this baby on the ultrasound I couldn't help but feel the amazing awe of how life works. How blessed I am to have the healthy, happy kids I do. And how blessed I am to be carrying another one. I'll try to remember this as I gain weight like a woman hoarding wendy's drive-thru food daily in her car!